People, Not Planes

We’ve all been there—stranded in a terminal, refreshing the airline app like it’s texting back an ex who ghosted us. Travel, for all its glamour, can feel like a toxic relationship. But what if we reframed those frustrating layovers and delays as opportunities? In this witty reflection, we shift the focus from missed flights to meaningful connections, reminding ourselves that the best part of the journey might just be the people we meet along the way—not the planes we missed.

Sunday, the day to sit down and work on the week ahead. Today, as I write, I should be on a plane heading to Wilmington, journeying back from a fabulous girl’s trip to Denver. Well, I am now waiting in the Dallas airport to go to Miami to catch a connecting flight to Wilmington – I am doing an amazing job of crossing half of the country fully today.

So, what is the best use of my time in an airport? The more that I travel, the more delays and cancellations I get, convincing myself that “this time will be different” like a toxic relationship where you just keep hoping that guy will change. This guy ain’t changing and if anything, it’s going to get worse.

Airports are busier and understaffed, weather patterns across the country have changed with more severe weather impacting flight paths, and airlines are pushed to the brink with maximizing passenger seating and luggage. Talk about a lot of baggage with this relationship – pun intended. I now say “I’m trying” to get somewhere, versus “I’m going.” I am non-committal to my plans based on the non-commitment of my so-called partner.

I truly believe that travel is important. Taking time away from the regular patterns of our lives to immerse ourselves in different cities and ways of life molds us into better humans. The experience is key – but what about the airport experience—the dead time waiting?

The longer I spend in airports, the more I realize there are often hours of time checking my app, checking my texts, and checking wallet notifications to see if my airline has texted me something sweet and wonderful – like “on time.” Or worse, updated me with, “sorry, we can’t see each other today because I’m canceling our plans – at the last minute, never mind your schedule.” Which then makes me question my sanity. I believe this is considered gaslighting in human relationship terms.

So if I stay in this relationship with my love for travel, which I inevitably will, I’ll have to accommodate, compromise, and “wait” for my plane to show up—at the cost of my own free will and desires.

Currently, I have 45 minutes to wait to board a plane that will take me 3 hours out of the way, in a seat I didn’t choose, because it was a favor to even get me on this flight. How do I continue to smile and enjoy my 45 minutes of time (I’ve already spent the past two hours finding something to eat and going outside because I wanted to breathe some outside air)?

The mindset. I’m not going to compromise my love for travel. Damn the bad relationship. It’s not going to stop me from expanding my world.

I’ve met some really fun people in airports and on planes. Usually, commiserating with fellow passengers and bemoaning the “bad relationship” helps, which then works into other fun topics about where people loved going and what they did when they were there.

People forget their current annoyance with the airline of choice, and dive into where they spent their honeymoon, where they hiked, and my bucket list of places to go grows longer.

I had a conversation today with a lady and her 10-year-old son—he has been literally everywhere with his mom and gave me tons of travel advice—with pictures of places to help his story. Brilliant. I now have Iceland and a different part of France on my list—thank you Henderson and his lovely mom.

Yelling at gate agents will get you nowhere. It becomes about trusting the process and spending time you normally wouldn’t spend talking to random strangers—not such an unsafe venture in an airport, since TSA is doing a good job of making sure there are no axe-murderers within the confines of the gate area (or at least no axes).

So the next time you think that you are losing your mind because your airline, once again, cancelled your date and stood you up, remember that there is no time lost in life—unless we lose it by not taking advantage of the downtime in a way that we can creatively turn into something better.

People, not planes.